Corinne (Ida Felner) Morris

My (Paul Dorio) Eulogy to my Grandmother, Corinne Morris, who died peacefully at her home in the Carlisle apartments, Naples, Florida, sometime during Valentine's Day night, between 14 and 15 February 2014.

My earliest memories of my grandmother were of "brown eggs" and yellow vinyl kitchen chairs that were somewhat uncomfortable to sit on but which "drayed," as she said in Yiddish. I would spin on them back-and-forth back-and-forth back-and-forth. It was fun. She would make my brother, Jay, and I brown eggs, which consisted of cooking the butter in the pan until it browned, followed by adding the eggs. It wasn't really that complicated but I loved it as did my brother. What does a kid of seven-ish know, right?

My grandparents lived in Massapequa, New York. We got to see them at least twice a year which was nice. My grandfather would kick back in his easy chair, clicking his remote-control which had exactly 4 buttons on it, and fall asleep to the Mets game. I would usually nap beside him.

Grandma made the best rugelach in the whole world. Matzoh Bri was always delicious. Her hand-knit sweaters were not worn terribly often as I was usually pretty warm, but were always cherished. These are just some of the things she did that are special to me.

Her love, of course, was most important and meant everything to me. Her Yiddish exclamations always infected us with smiles. We would hear her exclaim "yoy gut" or "gif a kik de punum," whenever she had something to point out about one of us. I was "de groisa" and Jay was "de kleina." I also have always been prone to whistling so I would often hear her say of me that I was "farfling." Basically her Yiddish commentary made visits with Grandma and Grandpa that much more exciting.

This little remembrance isn't just about Grandma of course. She was one half of a great team. Every minute that we spent with them was full. Grandpa was jolly, with twinkling eyes squinting at me, a big mustache which prickled when he kissed you, and a big belly that he would fold his hands over. He had a great wide-brimmed cowboy hat, high-heeled cowboy boots and a crisp, brown leather jacket that he often wore. He taught us CB radio call signs such as "breaker breaker for a 10-36." We would smile and laugh when a trucker would respond with the time! He taught us a card game, among other things, called Casino. With effort, I think I can remember most of the rules even now. I vividly remember playing that game. Jay would sometimes get a bit heated during these games, whereupon Grandpa would stop, look at him with that twinkle in his eyes that he always had and a little smirk, and ask him if he was still his friend. He would state categorically that he wanted to play with fun Fred not Gloomy Gus. Those nicknames have sort of stuck over the years. Nowadays though, Jay is mostly Fun Fred, though he does have his Gloomy Gus moments. But don't we all?

Grandpa died April 1, 1988. It was April Fools' Day. He and Grandma had lived in Fort Lauderdale for many years and subsequently Boca Raton, leading up to that date. We had visited them in Fort Lauderdale and then Boca yearly after their move from Massapequa. I remember their condominium in Fort Lauderdale but not much else. I remember the house in Boca Raton more vividly however. It was in a small retirement community just down the street from Grandma's sister Shandie and her husband Julie. We would hang out on their porch, a small enclosure with several lounge chairs, caricatures of "Bob" swinging a golf club and Corky, Grandma's nickname, and a typical porch table and chairs that we would play cards on. In fact, during medical school, my friend Joe and Mark visited her with me during one of our breaks. Grandma, typically somewhat biased or illogical in her praise, always said how much she liked my friend Joe and told me so often after that visit. I'm pretty sure Joe acted more of an Eddie Haskell character, able to endear himself to parental figures with relative ease. Not that he is a bad character, far from it. But he knew how to charm grandparents.

During one visit, after Amanda and I had met, we visited Grandma and went over to Aunt Shandie and Uncle Julie's house for dinner. Aunt Ruthie and Uncle Gene were there visiting as well. And if I remember correctly, one of Shandie's sons, David, was there also. It was at that gathering that I pulled out a video camera and recorded some of their stories. I would've liked to have done that on many more occasions, but it just never quite happened. The three sisters were very interesting characters.

Fast forward to 2005, Mom and Dad had moved to Naples and we decided to relocate to Naples also, having found what looked to be a promising radiology practice to join. In light of the fact that Grandma was getting on in years, Mom and Dad made the decision to move her from her home in Boca Raton to what would be her final residence, an assisted living facility with good reputation, the Carlisle. She spent the last eight years there and, I believe, was happy. Mostly though, I believe that being so close to one of her daughters, her son-in-law, and the five of us lengthened her life by years. This, of course, is just selfish speculation, but I, Amanda, Isaac, Adam, and Ava greatly enjoyed the time we spent with her. We visited her as often as possible. Usually, that meant we'd visit her about once every two weeks or so. We would gather at her apartment, say thank you for the usual plate of fruit, ice cream, éclairs, and chocolates that she would put out, and let the kids do their thing. With three kids, as one could imagine, there was always something interesting to share. The day after she died, we asked each kid what their favorite memory of Great Grandma was. Ava piped up immediately, as only a three-year-old can and said "I loved her kisses." Isaac was a bit disappointed that she wasn't going to be around for his upcoming piano recital, which is scheduled at her place for February 23. She died during the night of Valentine's Day, February 14, 2014. (The death certificate states 15 February 2014). Mom said that both of her parents must have had a sense of humor because Grandpa died on April Fools' Day and Grandma died on Valentine's Day. Obviously we know Mom is correct.

Life-and-death are funny things. Obviously, we had known Grandma was failing for many years, given that she had had almost 10 heart attacks over the years she lived in Naples. And she lived to 94, not bad in this day and age. So it wasn't completely unexpected when Mom called me to tell me that she died. But nevertheless, you always kind of think that your loved one will just keep going on from day today. Thankfully, she died peacefully in her own home, nowhere near a hospital or a doctor (and I say that AS a doctor!).

I think it is not just ironic but pretty timely that she checked out the day after a long awaited visit from Jonathan, Joel, Luisa and Allison and their baby girls, Gabriela and Lia. One doesn't have to be a rocket scientist or an astrologer to figure out the logic in that.

Apparently, and this is really awesome if you think about it, Grandma went to sleep the night after her visit with some of her grandchildren and great-grandchildren. She had a nice bath, dressed in her comfortable nightgown, and went to sleep in her bed. At 5:30 am, the assistant came to check on her and she had passed away in her sleep. I can only hope life is so kind to everyone I know. Grandma touched many lives. She had a uniquely endearing nature about her that no one will ever match. When she asked to see her “ugly” grandchildren and great-grandchildren, it was the clearest way in the world of her saying how gorgeous and wonderful she thought of all of us. There was never a single moment when it was ever in doubt that we were her whole world. I am lucky to have enjoyed spending time together with her. Sometimes, you don’t need a whole lot of wisdom or guidance. It’s the time spent just sitting in her apartment that mattered.

I said to Mom, I wonder if Grandpa was waiting in heaven, tapping his toes a bit, checking his Timex, and wondering when his "beshert" would be coming along. It had been quite a while that the two of them were separated. Even though it is not quite a Jewish thought, I think it is comforting to think of them together now. Thanks to Mom's and Dad's tireless caretaking, she will be interred next to Grandpa where they will remain forever. They are undoubtedly one again in both body and spirit. We love you Grandma/Great-Grandma.