Maude Ivy Helm

The favorite grandmother who was always a joy to be around. She could bake such yummy bread and always seemed to have fresh blackberries and home grown really thick cream and fresh veggies. Earliest memory of Joyce (Helm) Hastings-Loftis is on the farm in western Oklahoma when her brother, Jake, was dying of brain cancer. She was stroking his head and doing her best to comfort him in a day when there were very few effective pain medications. Grandmother Helm outlived her beloved daughters Sybil and Dorothy as well as her son, Norman (all of whom died at young ages and tragically). She was so overwhelmed by Norman's death, she could neither visit him in the hospital following the auto accident, nor attend his funeral.

She and Grandpa Helm took Morris Dean Dobbs to raise after the death of his mother, Sybil, who according to official reports, killed herself in the early 1950's. The family, however, has always felt that her death was no suicide or accident. Morris Dean was a difficult person to like. He was well educated, handsome, very arrogant and unstable. He moved to California in the late 1960's following his divorce from Billie, mother of his only child, Debbie. He married in California (name unknown) but later divorced again. I'm reasonably sure he was a disappointment to Grandma and Grandpa Helm.

Going even further back, these two patriarchs of our Helm family were made of strong stuff. They endured hardships we can only imagine during their early days in Mexico and later in Oklahoma. Grandma was especially fond of my sister, Norma Jeanne (we actually were always a bit jealous of NJ) because Grandma didn't hide her favoritism. I will say that both our grandparents loved all their grandchildren and were loved in return.