I am

Mikko "Big Daddy M" Laakso; MD, PhD; Spin doctor, and guru; Adjunct Professor in experimental radiology. Graduated from UKU, studied stuff and scored citations.

Born and raised in Tö Taawwn, with my Finnish roots in South to Eastern Finland. I confess to being biased towards Helsinki - Viipuri - Kuopio triangle, and the west or north being of lesser importance. I don't mind minor western influences in my DNA (who wants to be result of inbreeding?) but my mindset is of the axis above.

Wait! Who am I?

Beyond my Finnish genetic make-up, the shit gets kinda confusing. I just don't know. The same DNA, same sample even and, according to the FTDNA I'm about 75% Finn, and 25% what, Swiss? And 0% Scandinavian. Then, judging by MyHeritage I'm no Central European at all, but almost 40% Scandinavian. What a scam! I don't think genes lie, but how your genetic make-up is being calculated by different operators, that sucks ass.

Worse yet, people do DNA analyses, have them analyzed in shady scam businesses, and get all determined and shit about their looming cases of death. And the last thought that passes their tiny minds when they die in a car crash is "But I was supposed to die of Alzheimer's?"

Much Worse than Worse yet, is that they grow genetically modified kids. In a Facebook group which ousted me in no time, they figured how their kids are genetically not musical in nature but more into the sports. When I said I don't think you can see that in your DNA, I was being heretical. "My kid, who is sporty spice, is his muscle tissue more of the exploding type or more of the endurance? BTW, does anybody from this group want to buy a Stratovarius? Or change it to a hockey stick?"

Some people grow genetically modified kids based on these data...

Based on the data above, I made a sort of mental average of it. Trust me, I have tried other sites too, and they are not made the issue any more clear. Rather the opposite. I don't think the DNA lies but the way it is computed does.

If the genes, or the tree, did determine who I am, I probably would be a bishop of Viipuri. Or the Rabbi of Vipuri.Alas, I'm not. If nurture determined who I am I would be all nice and stuff. If my niche would determine who I am... Wait a minute, it does. I am a doctor. Like everybody up in the Valley. Not much docs in my family. But in my hood, yes, a-plenty.