Richard Lowell Coskey

Written by Richard Coskey early 2004:

WHO WAS HE?

My given name is Richard Lowell Coskey. I sign most documents as Richard L. Coskey. As a child, some of my relatives called me “Mike,” presumably because of my red hair. That title didn’t stick. I was “Dick” in school and training days. In medical practice, “Richard” sounded better. After retirement, most again address me as “Dick”.

Why am I writing this note? Looking back, I knew little of my parent’s background and thoughts. It wasn’t something that I asked about and nothing that they shared with their little “Dickala”. Is anyone interested in my background? I don’t know, but some questions may be answered.

My parents were Rose and Jerry. You won’t find that name on my Dad’s birth or death certificates, because it was a nick name that he acquired when he came to the west coast, so that you could tell when people met him, Isidore or Ike from the east coast, Jerry after coming west. Mom devoted her life to being a housewife and raising Marlene & me. She was a good cook, and knew that yummy foods with lots of butter were tasty and good for us. She made me feel special, although in retrospect, my time at home was fairly benign. No special projects nor interests, just lots of studying. The house was always spotless, and she passed on her interest in keeping the environment neat & tidy to me. Both parents had strong feelings about what was right and wrong, and it was traumatic to me after getting into the real world and learning that many people actually cheat, lie and do things that I knew were morally wrong. Entering into the real world and medical practice was an eye opener, realizing that a significant amount of the people I worked with had different moral values than what I was learned. Our parents taught us to do our best, and not worry if others might be better. Just try as hard as you can, and be comfortable with the results. I was also taught that as a Jew, I had to work harder than the others to achieve the same goals as others. That training stuck. In summary, the two concepts that I have carried with me through life have been:

• Tell the truth. I may not answer all questions in the way they were asked, but it is very very rare that I will not tell the truth. One friend of mine years ago considered it my major failing.

• Work harder than others might do to accomplish a goal, as mentioned above.

• Decision making: Think out a problem, obtain all the available information, then solve it without wavering. Some felt that I was inflexible, and maybe that was so, but my response was that I’d already analyzed the variables, and then knew where I was going.

• Accentuate the positive. Our glass is often half full or half empty. We can either complain abut our problems and disparage those with whom we don’t agree, or emphasize the good things that are happening in our lives. The choice is always there.

Dad worked long hours as a general practitioner, including keeping the office open one night per week. Those were the nights that our Mother took us to a Chinese restaurant, where we enjoyed what I considered great food just a couple blocks from our home. On weekends, Dad often took one or both of us to see members of the family, while Mom often stayed home. Dad was often offering medical advice to family members, and our visits were not infrequently a form of sick call. I decided then that if I ever got into medicine, I would not repeat that performance, and never did.

Dad and I would frequently go for horseback rides in Griffith Park one morning of the weekend. It was a lovely time to be together and enjoy each other’s company in the absence of other distractions. Since then, I have felt very comfortable on a horse, although I ride very rarely. After we left for college, the folks major social contacts were in a “Youth Aliah” group. They were neither joiners nor volunteers. Their lives were quiet, with only that one social group and contact with the family, mainly my Father’s side. There was closeness with Father’s brothers and sisters, not as much with the older step sisters. There were Aunt Lu, Uncles Jack, Tobe and Al. Uncle Leo would have been on the list if he were in L.A. rather than Detroit. I had little insight into their private thoughts or their growing up years. That may be the main reason that I’m sitting down now to offer some very brief comments on recollections of my time on this earth.

I had a bicycle accident when about 10 years old, being hit by a car in an intersection and breaking my right femur. I was in bed with a cast for a month or two, giving my Mother lots of extra work and reading an unbelievable number of comic books during that time. I recall my hands being black at the end of the day from handling all the newsprint. I recovered without incident after the cast was removed.

We moved from 320 North Martel to 253 South La Peer so that Marlene & I could be in the Beverly Hills school district. We had a good education before college, and I’m sure that it served me well. I went to UCLA & received a BA in premedical studies, then off to UC for Medical School. That was my first time away from home. It was a great experience, realizing that I could take care of myself away from my parents. For the first time, I saw folks who drank a lot and partied to the detriment of their studies. That seemed pretty dumb to me. My roommate & I relied on the local pet food store in the first year in medical school for our major protein intake, frequently enjoying “filly mignon” for dinner. The price was right. After finishing the first year of medical school, I got part time jobs in school & summer time, and no longer relied upon our parents for support. The work load was grossly heavier than in undergraduate, and in my first year, there were times when I considered dropping out. After the trauma of the first year cleared, I settled down and was comfortable with the load. I lived with friends, Ken Elconin in the first year in a converted attic, Murray Shevick and Ernie Katz in the second year, fraternity house the third year and Les Cohn and others the fourth year. I got along well with my roommates and studied hard. It was an enjoyable experience. Not a lot of socializing. Murray & I spent a little time in the public San Francisco darkroom, but that was my only time processing film until shortly before retirement. Took some extra training in Psychiatry and realized that that specialty was not for me. Listening to complaining or inadequate persons all day seemed to be a substitute for Hell. I decided then that my desire was to help people with organic, not mental disease. It has been my firm impression that if you have a problem, you solve it, eliminate it, or avoid it. To complain to others but make no attempt to solve the problem doesn’t sit well with me. In other words, act, don’t complain. One example is the overweight individual who refuses to accept a reasonable diet. So much for that.

Dad died of sudden death in the middle of my senior year in Medical School. It was very traumatic, with my thoughts for the rest of that year constantly going back to him and thinking about all that I owed him. My Mother never fully recovered, with her social life being based upon her long standing Youth Aliah friends. I often considered her life to be very lonely and Marlene’s and my marriage and our children seemed to improve the quality of Mom’s life.

I came back to LA to intern at Los Angeles County General Hospital. It was the most fascinating experience of my life, being exposed to new challenges on a daily basis. I often regret the absence of good writing skills, because it was such a moving event in my life. Every day was a series of new experiences, being responsible for life and sometimes seeing death instead. Long hours of work, but never boredom. I was no longer only a student, but a practitioner responsible for others. Sometimes I felt inadequate for the job, but that went with the territory. If you were comfortable with everything you did, you missed a lot.

After completing internship, I was off to the Air Force for two years to satisfy my duty to my country, which let me finish training rather than being drafted while in college. I was fortunate to have an assignment in Fuchu, just outside Tokyo. It was a major air force base, serving both military personnel and dependants. It was there that I realized that although I enjoyed children and had thoughts of entering Pediatrics, I could not enjoy my contact with the mothers and their emotional problems raising children. I enjoyed a lot of traveling around Japan and Southeast Asia. Did a lot of photography, but didn’t process the film. Earned a private pilot’s license over there, which was great fun, soloing over Tokyo, etc. Upon returning to the USA for residency, I had neither the time nor money to continue flying, and so ended a very brief career in the air.

I returned home in late 1959 and learned from my sister that there was a gal I should meet. Eleanor was waiting for my call, having been forewarned. On our first date, she guided me to a Japanese restaurant overlooking the San Fernando Valley. She thought that it would bring back memories of my recent tour in Japan. Nothing in Japan was ever that phony, but we kept on dating in spite of the first date and married less than a year later. Our dating experience was lovely, often sailing rented sloops in Newport Harbor. Eleanor put up with watching lots of slides from Japan, but stopped that pastime as soon as she received a wedding ring.

My 3+ years of residency in Internal Medicine & Cardiology were fascinating, but took up a lot of time, day & night. Eleanor put up with my long hours, but I’m sure it was a strain wondering when I’d be coming home after a night on call. Realizing that each day/night on call was followed by another day working, then coming home exhausted, I was really busy every 2 of 3 days for a 6 week rotation shortly after our marriage. We’ll both remember that rotation on the Diabetes service. Cardiology Fellowship at St. Vincent Hospital in Los Angeles under Oscar Magidson was thrilling, learning how to work very closely with the cath lab crew, learning how to pass cardiac catheters on children and adults and becoming a cardiac specialist. They were heady days.

Our marriage began in an apartment in Hollywood. After finishing training, we moved to a home in Woodland Hills, where Eleanor gave birth to our three children in fairly rapid succession, completing our family in a little over three years. We then realized that our first home was not in the desired location to raise children. With three in diapers and her husband busy establishing a practice, Eleanor found our present home, where we have been happily living for over 34 years.

I joined Bob Oblath & Sam Stone in the practice of internal medicine & cardiology. We soon limited our practice to cardiology and referred out our non cardiac patients. It was a big step in those days, but it worked well for us. The practice grew; we stayed busy, and were a well respected group, which remains the case after Bob, Sam & I retired.

Cardiology practice was exciting and challenging. In addition to clinical practice, I was asked soon after entering practice to set up & run a cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR) program at St. Joseph Hospital. The concept of CPR was in its infancy, but when I bowed out, it was standard practice in any major hospital. I did that for about 12 or 13 years, then was chosen to develop and run a dedicated (free standing, not associated with the Radiology Department) cardiac catheterization lab. I greatly enjoyed working with our secretarial and technical personnel, but keeping the doctors in line was major chore. Like any organization, most are of the people were fine and easy to work with. One cardiologist was a good technician, but morally and emotionally bankrupt, giving me more problems than the rest of the lab combined. It was a relief when I finally resigned the directorship after 20 years.

At the same time that I was directing the cath lab, I was chosen to organize and run a Pacemaker Clinic. That was very stimulating, and also lasted about 20 years, with the last few years running the clinic from our cardiology office rather than the hospital.

Seeing our three children grow and develop was a thrill for both of us. Eleanor carried most of the burden in view of my long hours, and did a magnificent job. Coming home to Eleanor & three happy children was a joy that I can never forget. All the problems of the day vanished when I opened the door and was greeted by four happy faces. We enjoyed recording their childhood thoughts on tapes which are still available. “Family meetings” were frequent, a way for our children to blow off steam regarding their interpersonal relations and I believe helped cement us as a unified family. They were great meetings, helping us to understand each other and respond to mutual needs and desires. It was also a venue that was meant to put one’s positive, rather than negative side in the forefront. Jobs at home were shared by our three children, although they could bargain with each other to exchange jobs if mutually acceptable. When the children left for college, my role modeling days were over & I hired a gardener. It was hard for me to see each leave for college, and it seemed to take me about a year to recover from each departure. We heard how hard they were working. When I saw how accomplished the boys were at computer games, it was obvious that they had at least a little free time.

My mother died of uterine cancer while I was in practice. Toward her terminal illness, she stayed with Marlene and then with us. She was a lovely woman, and seeing the ravages of her advanced malignancy was a horrible experience for all until she was finally at peace. Bowel obstruction, which was her terminal problem, struck me as one of the least desirable ways to leave.

I retired at the end of 1995, just after my 65th birthday. I missed the patients, my partners, and the fine doctors, nurses and technicians with whom we were privileged to work. The main frustration I had throughout practice was the time pressure, trying to be on time and not keep patients waiting in the exam rooms. It never ended, but there was no other way. We packed a lot of work into every day.

Since retiring, life has been very enjoyable. Photography has been an excellent learning experience, as I gained abilities in the dark room and realized that I was able to do a respectable job shooting, developing, printing and matting my images. Eleanor has been very supportive and has helped me a lot with her critique and suggestions, as have Jill & Dave. Eleanor & I have enjoyed more unhurried time together since retirement, making it even more enjoyable.

Belonging to Plato, a study discussion group in Westwood under UCLA Extension has been another marvelous experience in retirement. I have enjoyed many interesting courses, in the US economy and judicial systems, several covering Russia and the Middle East, cults, photography, geology, the discovery of measuring latitude, cults, etc. We have also met a magnificent group of people who would not have otherwise entered our lives.

I feel unbelievably fortunate, to have enjoyed such a rewarding marriage, raising such outstanding children, and at the same time having a challenging career in which I feel I have made a small contribution to the world in which we live. I couldn’t ask for more.